Limitless

2008-06-26T11:11:00.000-07:00

Hey guys, Bryan and I are condensing our blogs to just one - i know so sad...we just thought it would be easier on everyone if they only had to check just one! And maybe there will be more posts! So heres the new blog address:

www.kbisbell.blogspot.com

Fuel 08

2008-06-09T06:32:00.000-07:00

"Words fail me this morning as I try to process and explain what we saw and what happened on the mountain. Your presence leaves us speechless, yet changed, and our actions become the microphone for what happened on the mountain." (my journal)

As people have asked me about camp, a huge smile and joy has come to my lips in a huge grin, as I have said, it was great! However, I always feel as though my words fail to fully express just how great it was and the life change that happened. However, I know that what happened on the mountain needs to be shared, and that the life change that happened in us will be revealed in our changed actions.

This is a song that has come to my mind all week. Its by one of my favorite musicians, Bebo Norman.

It's a better place
Standing high upon this mountain
I've seen your face
Full of the light that only this height can show
A blistered hand is what you've given
But we've been given all we'll ever need to know

So walk down this mountain
With your heart held high
Follow in the footsteps of your maker
With this love that's gone before you
And these people at your side
If you offer up your broken cup
You will taste the meaning of this life

It's a common ground
And I see we're all still standing
Just look around and you'll find
The very face of God
He's walking down into the distance
He's walking down to where the masses are

No Regrets

2008-04-09T06:37:00.000-07:00

As we wrapped up our No Regrets series at church this Sunday, I have been processing all of it the last couple of days.

Right after we got married/graduated from college, Bryan and I had to make a decision about our future. I wanted to go on staff with a ministry more than anything, and I had prayed about and so had Bryan and we felt peace so we moved forward. However, as we began raising our support, the money was just not coming in. At first we continued to trust God, knowing that He would be faithful to provide. After several months of this though, we decided to go back to our knees to hear from Him again, and the still soft voice whispered, "this is a good thing, but not the best thing". We know God would have used us in that place, but it wasn't the best. This phrase has come back across my mind as I have processed living with no regrets.

I want God's best for my life, but I know that in order to get to that place I'm going to have to take risks. I can play it safe and have what is good, but to have what is best involves risk and trusting Him. I can love those who are easy to love and love me back, but loving those who might not give me anything back or who are hard to love will involve risk, but it will also allow me to become more like Christ. I can conform to the world and who it says I should be, and have a good life, but choosing who Christ says I am and living for eternal purposes will be much more satisfying.

I know I will not always choose correctly, because its comfortable to play it safe, but I want to at least live a life pursuing the choices with no regrets.

4 X's

2008-03-21T22:03:00.000-07:00

Birds are out to get me...

Today Bryan and I had were enjoying the beautiful day on Samford Lawn, in the Lovliest Village on the Plains(Auburn University). Spring in Auburn is definitely one of my favorites! We were also both enjoying meals from our favorite restaurant in Auburn. As I was indulging in my turkey wrap and sweet potato chips from Amsterdam Cafe a bird dropped a present right on my leg!!! Now this would not be so dramatic were it not the FOURTH time in my life that this has happened-please tell me this is some sort of record!

Twice I have been "gifted" on the head and now twice on some other area of my body. This may have something to do with the target a blue bird pecked into my head sometime in elementary school when I walked too close to her nest of baby blue birds, but I do think I have paid my dues for innocently trespassing while going to my swing set.

However, it provided a great laugh for us and a wonderful memory of our picnic on the plains!

(Just make sure not to walk too close to me when birds are nearby. )

2008-03-13T16:39:00.000-07:00

As a senior at Auburn, I had no idea that graduating and "growing up" would also mean no TCBY. Growing up, every Sunday night after church we would stop by TCBY on the way home. It was one of the first places I got to drive after getting my drivers license. So you can imagine my disappointment when it closed in Montgomery. Not to despair, when I moved to Auburn I was elated to find the 4 beautiful letters. However, my weekly(sometimes twice weekly) visits to TCBY came to a sad end after we moved away from Auburn(and I'm sure their profits saw a slight decline as well). Over the last two years, my TCBY visits have been very few. Yesterday I had a serious craving and was happy to find a TCBY on the way home and enjoyed every single bite of my White Chocolate Mouse with Reese's cups shiver on the way home today! Although its not really convenient for a daily basis, it is close enough for once or twice a month =).

Meting Needs

2008-01-29T10:36:00.000-08:00

Over the weekend, I attended a women's retreat at my home church in Montgomery, AL with my mom and my sister. It was a great time of fun, food, chocolate, and teaching. The weekend was "Loving Well" a retreat teaching series by Beth Moore. We watched 4 teaching sessions on love and the people in our life that we are called to love.

People in our lives typically fall into four categories: joy, testy, foe, stranger. Joy is easy to love, Testy is difficult to love, Foe is impossible to love, and Stranger only comes in our life randomly.

I was challenged in each area, especially testy, however some things Beth said about loving "stranger" really impacted me.

Loving stranger..."is an opportunity to love with no strings attached and to love not for what we can get back for it"

"Loving a stranger relieves us of the burden of self-absorption"

So often our first thought is to witness to a "stranger" when by meeting their needs first its sets a better stage for them to receive the truth of the gospel. David also challenged the students with this idea at SHIFT this weekend. The Lord has really challenged me to be more aware of the needs in peoples lives and share the gospel with them through meeting those needs!

An Amazing Testament

2008-01-24T13:10:00.000-08:00

Rick Burgess is the co-host of the Rick and Bubba Show, a popular morning talk-show primarily aired in AL. He and Bubba have always been very open about their faith in Christ and have been great witnesses for His Name.

Tragically Rick and his family lost their 2 year old son in a drowing accident over the weekend. I have just listened to the memorial service where Rick spoke, and could not be prouder to call him my brother in Christ. He has turned this event into an opportunity to bring glory to God's name and bring people to Christ! I encourage you to take the time to listen to him share his heart and the journey he has gone through the last several days. His speech is an amazing testament to God's grace, mercy, faithfulness, love, kindness, comfort, and promises to carry us through the trials that we will endure on this earth. May we surround him and his family with prayers!

Media File:
http://www.strengthtostand.com/audio/BronnerMemorial-RicksMsg.mp3

You Tube:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5PUHUZWyFeg
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B7aNDixS2J0
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DUT8Bk6Ou90

Buddhism teaches them niceness

2008-01-10T17:04:00.000-08:00

On the way home from work Bryan was sleeping so I listened to the Wednesday weekly edition of Dr. Blue on Star 94. I don't really like him, or his counseling philosophies, however, since I am pursuing a career in counseling(one day) I still like to listen.

Dr. Blue just got back from a 3 week visit to Thailand. His comments on the country were that the people were so nice, and that he had never been treated with such "niceness". "Buddhism teaches them niceness". Having been to two Buddhist/Hindu countries, I can agree with him that yes culturally they are very nice (for the most part-the rude ones are out there and you just don't understand their language) But what impacted me more than anything was the fact that he equated their religion with their actions-positive actions.

I hope that when people meet Christians they think things like this as well. I pray that we will be a generation of believers marked by love, patience, kindness, compassion, forgiveness...

I told you...

2008-01-02T17:53:00.001-08:00

Well, last night around 10 we got a wonderful New Year's surprise - snow flurries! It wasn't much and it stopped by midnight but it was a wonderful promise that 2008 is going to be a great year =) I love snow and I know that it might not have excited as many people as it did me and bryan. It also reminded me that Christ promised to wash us white as snow.

"says the LORD. "Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red as crimson, they shall be like wool." Isaiah 1:18

Happy New Year

2008-01-01T18:34:00.000-08:00

I am so excited about 2008...because I love even numbers. Not that odd numbered years are bad I just really love even numbered years. I will also turn an even number age this year which makes me happy as well. I know its a strange obsession, but it makes me smile.

So on a more serious note...

As the new year has approached I have thought about things that I want to change and work on. Some carry over from years past that I am still working towards and then there are new ones. My biggest goal is a shift in my mindset. Instead of basing my choices on what I want, how I feel I am realize my mindset needs to shift to what is best and making wise choices and my feelings will catch up. Most of this involves only certain areas of my life that need this mentality shift, however, I know that change starts in the renewing of the mind. Also that discipline will develop out of this as well.

I am looking forward to 2008 with much anticipation simply because I serve a God that is good and I know whatever this year holds will be to further His Kingdom and I am glad to be a part of it. I hope 2008 is a wonderful year for us all as we seek first His Kingdom!

2007-12-25T15:30:00.000-08:00

"Your righteousness is like the mighty mountains, your justice like the great deep. O LORD, you preserve both man and beast." Psalm 36:6

"You will go out in joy and be led forth in peace; the mountains and hills will burst into song before you, and all the trees of the field will clap their hands." Isaiah 55:12

After several days of rain(although it was much needed), the clouds parted and the blue ridge mountains were crystal clear. As the mountains came into view my heart was flooded with many thoughts and emotions. I have always loved the mountains since my first visit to Colorado in elementary school, and it seems that each spiritual place for me in my life involves mountains. I have posted a picture of mt. everest in Nepal where I traveled on my first mission trip and am reminded of the beautiful people there, and all that happened in my life on those two trips. Mt. Ranier in Washington reminds me of close friends, family, laughter, refuge. The view from 400 is the promise of adventure, growth, and all that our move to GA promises to bring.

Did I mention that I love mountains?

Eternal Perspective

2007-12-22T14:25:00.000-08:00

On my way home the other day Christy Nockels and I were spending some quality time together jamming out. As I was belting out with her praises to our King, I was overwhelmed just at how good our God is and thats when it all hit me.

As I posted previously the last few weeks have been marked by some struggles as well as watching others walk through their own insecurity battles. As I took that time in the car to just focus on God and praise Him, my lens came into clear focus. When I was focused on myself and my insecurities, comparing myself to others, and trying to meet the percieved expectations of others, the perspective I had of myself was blurry. I couldn't see myself for who I truly was. As I shifted my focus to Christ and an eternal perspective my vision cleared and I could see myself as I truly am; and accept the creation that God crafted.

As a wise friend recently told me; "when we go to that place of insecurity we are no longer free to be ourselves nor can we be who others need us to be" (not word for word but you get the idea). Satan wants us to be focused on ourselves and he tries to do this through insecurity. As I have seen in my own life this week, when am I in that place of insecurity and focused on that it cripples me from walking in the freedom of Christ. It also hinders my being used by God because I am not looking to Him.

As I have shifted my perspective to an eternal one, I now see my insecurities from a temporal angle. Am I going to walk in security everyday for the rest of my life? No, I know that everyday will be a choice to have an Eternal perspective or an Internal perspective-so feel free to ask me if I am being Eternal or Internal!

Merry Christmas

War on Beauty

2007-12-17T12:51:00.000-08:00

Over the last several weeks I have battled some personal insecurity struggles. During this time people have fought alongside me against their own enemies, while I have seen others crumble under the intensity of the attack. Mind you there were some days that I was badly wounded because the enemy seemed more powerful that day and I too crippled under the intensity. However, as the attack is ceasing for now, my heart is aching as I look around me and see how many have been crippled by the seemingly overwhelming power of the enemy. The war on beauty that women are facing each day is, I believe, at one of its fiercest levels.

As I am fighting this battle, I am recognizing again the importance of clinging to the truth of God's word, concerning our bodies...His Temple. Because the lies of this world concerning beauty and our bodies are so strong we have to be constantly armed with God's word in order to be able to live in victory. Now, I say this as a personal lesson I am learning myself.

I am seeing more and more Christian women falling subject to the lies of deciet concerning our bodies the world is telling us. I am not saying that exercising, wearing make-up, cute clothes, etc. is wrong I am just seeing so many women "fixing" themselves because they feel that the way they were created isn't good enough. I too have felt this deep pain of feeling like certain parts of my body weren't "just right". And although I don't always feel like my body is beautiful the way the Master crafted it, I know that the truth is that it is. Over the last several weeks I have struggled to cling to this truth, but more than anything I have longed for all women to be set free by this truth, and to know that our true beauty comes from our inside out.

Not only is the media targeting women's perceptions of true beauty, but they are also warping men's perceptions of beauty. The war on beauty is not only on us as women but also on our men.

My prayer today is that God's truth would renew our minds and that when we look in the mirror we would see ourselves as He sees us, a beautiful creation, a reflection of Him.

Very Cool video:

http://www.campaignforrealbeauty.com/home.asp

Faith, Hope, Love

2007-12-09T18:21:00.000-08:00

We have been doing a series at church on Faith. My heart has been stirred as we have talked about God's greatness and faithfulness to work on His children's behalf. The definition that we are using for Faith is: "The belief that God can and the hope that God will". This has brought me back to my blog title and the deepest desire of my heart. I want to always believe that God can perform what might seem impossible to me, and I never want to limit His ability to work on my behalf due to my lack of belief or trust that He can. I know that in His sovereignty what I want or ask may not always be what is best...and I gladly rest in His wisdom of what is best for my life. Continuing on this path Bryan and I have started our own family "advent" since we didn't have an advent book this year but we had the candles. During the advent season there are 5 candles, 4 for the Sundays prior to Christmas and then 1 for christmas day. For our first three Sundays we have done our devotions on faith, and hope, and next week will be on love. I know that leaves two candles, but the last one obviously is about Jesus and the fourth one well...that is yet to be determined.

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.
1 Corinthians 13:13

You can listen or watch the messages at:
www.mountainlakechurch.org

Enemy Lines

2007-11-25T10:15:00.000-08:00

Its comforting to know that when the battle wounds us Jesus allows us to come and rest in His arms as we heal. He doesn't ask us to be strong and keep fighting despite the pain, He allows us to stop and rest until the pain subsides. So often our world tells us to ignore the wounds of life and be strong and overcome them yet Jesus draws us in to speak healing truth to our wounds. He has given us every weapon we need to win our battles against the Enemy, and yet when we lose a battle there is no criticism for how we fought only words of wisdom as to how to better fight next time. I look forward with such joy when Jesus returns to throw the Enemy into the depths of hell, lock the gate and throw away the key(and there is no spare for this key).

It's also comforting to have a husband that will reflect Jesus' arms.

New Blog

2007-10-26T22:23:00.001-07:00

Hey...I started a new blog just to keep people updated on our life since this is more of my personal thoughts. Check it out!

www.kbisbell.blogspot.com

Destination Unknown

2007-10-09T12:59:00.000-07:00

Its so good to be back in the blogging world. Thanks for those of you who faithfully checked even when I didn't post for quite some time!

Fall is one of my favorite times of year especially now that the leaves are turning! I just love seeing God's amazing creativity and thoughtfulness in the transformation of creation during the seasons! I wish it were a little cooler but soon enough. An additional thing that I get to enjoy the sight of everyday when I come home are the foothills of the appalachain mts. We are hopefully going to make it up there soon to enjoy them! We are going camping the first weekend in November. It's a family tradition I look forward to every year.

I have a ton that I could blog about because Tozer's book is so rich i'm having to read it slowly(also due to the fact that its written in 1940 style english). However I like the title of this topic.

This past week Rodney talked about the aim of "Awakening" and did an amazing job. It was also quite hilarious because it paralled some of the things I had read in Oswald Chamber's "My Utmost for His Highest" earlier in the week. I just love it when the Lord is so clear about what He wants to tell me that He does so three and four times.

The basic principle was that "Awakening is not a destination but a journey to be lived". This thought so simple and yet so profound reminded me that my destination is Heaven and my time on the earth is the journey. So often though I get distracted by my earthly destinations and lose sight of my eternal One. It helped to reawaken me to a principle our friend Brennan Manning talks about "Being fully present in the present". I have a hard time with this on many different levels because I can space out at any moment and enter my day dreaming world and so often I live in the future that I miss the "strawberries" of the present(another Brennan analogy). I am so excited about the dreams that God has placed in my heart and I desperately want to see them come into fruition, but I also know that He wants to do things in and through me right now today exactally where I am. I am excited to live with the mindset of "destination unknown" (in an earthly sense) and focus on my heavenly one. Although being the planner and daydreamer that I am this is a hard mindset to live by it brings such freedom to say ok...wherever, whenever I'm ready(thanks Farah).

Relentless Pursuit

2007-10-04T13:33:00.000-07:00

I have started a book that I have had for several years and am just now reading(like many I posess). However, I think my finding it during unpacking the other day and the sudden desire to read it over others was simply because of what the Lord wanted to continue to stir in my heart along with what He had already started as a result of the Awakening series at church.

A.W. Tozer's book "The Pursuit of God" is a fairly well known one and one I think every believer must read. The forward drew me in as I read Tozer's heart behind the book as well as a brief synopsis of his own personal pursuit that led to the book. I was hungry...and the first bite was so satisfying I have been chewing on it for several days.

Tozer says: "We pursue God, and only because, He has first put an urge within us that spurs us to the pursuit."

Although I have heard "God pursues you first you did not go to Him first" before on many different occasions, this time it melted my heart and a swell of deep love and desire washed over me as I thought about God's relentless pursuit of His people since the beginning of time. Having been a Christian since a young age sometimes the "pursuit" seems like its been my pursuing God(and usually not enough of it). The Lord just gently spoke to my heart that He relentlessly pursues me still as well as all His children. Then Shawn's story of his own personal "fresh picture" of God came to my mind as I thought about how Shawn shared that God chose us, me his adopted, sinful children over his pure, holy son. Christ asked for the cup to be passed away from Him if possible, but because of God's relenless pursuit of His people He chose to put the sin of the world and seperation from His son(for a time) so that He could have a relationship with His people and the vail could be torn. I have basked in the wonderful thought that our Holy, Magnificent, Powerful God relentlessly pursues us at all cost. His love is so deep for us and He has blessed me with a fresh picture of how deep His love is. Knowing daily that I am this deeply loved and living in light of it stirs my hunger for more of my Jesus.

It's About Time

2007-09-30T13:51:00.000-07:00

Well after several months of procrastination I am re-entering the blog world. Part of my delay is that I don't have reliable access to the internet because we dont' have internet at our house and the computers at school are IBM's if that is any hint to the age and speed of them. Needless to say blogging on them would be a two hour process.

Bryan and I have settled into our home here in GA(somewhat) and have gotten into a routine with our jobs/commute. We both are enjoying our jobs and exploring our new home. We have joined a great church and are getting plugged in there in several areas. We have joined a growth group of other young married couples and love it! We meet weekly with them and are really enjoying building those relationships. So thats really it for now...life is good and we really love being on the same schedule, having our own home and being settled at least for a year or so =).

I will have to back-post what all the Lord has been teaching me since we moved here. One of the really neat things has been with our students at school. I am working with 6 autistic students(all boys) in Kindergarten and 1st grade in a self-contained classroom with a teacher and another aid. In only 6 weeks I have fallen in love with these boys and have such a desire to see them improve in all areas. It has been such a humbling experience to work with these boys and better understand what its like for families with children who have special needs but also just how to love on these boys. I am excited about all that the Lord wants to teach me through them.

Right now our church has begun a new series called "Awakening". I will have to post more later since this one has gotten so long, but I am very excited about what the Lord is stirring in my heart and the body here in Cumming, GA.

www.mountainlakechurch.org - Check it out!

Details

2007-07-15T08:38:00.000-07:00

This last week has been one of the craziest weeks of my life; however, the Lord also pulled all the details together a midst the craziness.

My nephew Tyler James Brewer entered 7 weeks early on Tuesday, July 11 at 1:02 pm. He and Jennifer are both doing great. To see pictures of him you can go to www.lorimercer.com/tylerbrewer

Bryan is going to be teaching Health and coaching PE at Snellville Middle School and I am going to be a teacher's aid at Hopkins Elementary School. We are both excited about these jobs. I am going back to school to work on my Master's degree and we are going to be attending an amazing church with many growth and service opportunities for both of us.

We are still working on the housing situation but will hopefully have that nailed down by the end of next week. As soon as we have a place to live we will pack up and head over, right now though we are still enjoying our time with friends and family in Montgomery. I am hoping that the change in pace of our lives will allow me more time to blog, but I won't make promises I can't keep...so hopefully more blogs will come but don't hold me to it.

Oh Yeah...

2007-06-09T10:41:00.000-07:00

We're moving...mid-July...metro-Atlanta area...details will come as we know them

Miss Oklahoma

2007-06-08T19:49:00.001-07:00

I know its been way too long since I last blogged, but life has been crazy!

Currently, I am in Tulsa, OK watching my best friend Julia McNeese compete for Miss Oklahoma. Its been a great time of relaxing during the day and then competition at night. Tulsa is a very interesting city with a lot of historical places. I tried to post some pictures but my computer is weird and I couldn't. I promise to post more often

For Meagan Maki

2007-02-10T08:33:00.000-08:00

This post is for Megan Maki the faithful blogger who still checks my blog despite my not blogging for so many months now. Bryan and I have settled into life here in Montgomery(sort of). The "slower" pace of life we had anticipated has yet to be found. I am still working at Curves and reaching women which I love, however we are seeking the Lord on the next step for us. This time in Montgomery is much needed as far as investing in our families and a time of spiritual renewal. We are, however, ready to move on to the things the Lord has put in our hearts. I apologize for my not blogging recently I just have not made the time to process and share what the Lord has been teaching me. However, I will post a little more later on what the book of Daniel has been revealing.

No I didn't disappear

2006-09-16T17:11:00.000-07:00

1. WAR EAGLE- Auburn beat LSU
2. I get to wear workout clothes everyday to work!
3. I get to share the love of Jesus with almost 200 women on a weekly basis
4. I get to spend 3 hours with my sister and nephew everyday
5. I get a three day weekend
6. I have an amazing husband who wants to see me set free from the lies that I believe
7. I have amazing friends who are always there for me
8. My nieces and nephews are the coolest kids around
9. I love living next door to David and Farah
10. I love our dog Bailey

Job 4

2006-08-21T11:04:00.001-07:00

So...since graduating last December my job situation has varied. I am currently at my third job since April. Job 1. Daycare 2. Dr. Office 3. Real Estate Co. receptionist Probably not good to put on resume that my typical length of employment is about two months. Thankfully I can say this change in jobs is not due to being fired, but to better jobs coming along. I have gained experience at each job and narrowed down which positions do not fit into my "dream" job.

So on to job 4- I will soon become the manager of a Curves Fitness for Women club that my friend owns in Montgomery. I am really excited about this opportunity. I will get to interact with and minister to women-which I love to do. I will get to encourage them and pray with them, because Curves is a christian company. My schedule will be amazing with 3 days off each week. I am so excited that the Lord has blessed me with this opportunity. I have wanted to work with Curves for awhile and the positions were not available. It will give me great experience and training to further the ultimate goals I have for my life and feel called to accomplish for the Lord. The schedule will allow me to have more free time to work on other things that I have been trying to finish for several years, as well as be more workable with going back to school online.

I am excited about the things the Lord has for us in the this next year. The Lord's quiet voice continues to speak whispers of what is to come and to be patient in this time of preperation.

Our House

2006-08-14T19:27:00.000-07:00

we live in 24 and they live in 20.

This is our new home. We live next door to David and Farah(Bryan's brother and sister-in-law).
Its a lot of fun to live next door to family...its still weird b/c they lived in WA for the last 5 years...so its odd to just walk next door and there they are. However, we love hanging out with them and playing with the boys and Faith(their dog) and Bailey are great playmates. The upstairs is not yet picture ready...so look forward to more pics once we get settled upstairs. Our life as usual has been a little crazy...but we don't mind all the madness.

Meet Bailey

2006-08-14T19:13:00.000-07:00

Bailey is the newest member to the Isbell clan.
He is a lab mix(what he's mixed with we don't know) But as you can see he's adorable.

Catching up

2006-08-14T19:00:00.000-07:00

Baby Cole is always smiling or laughing.

This is me driving the JEEP! Its great having a brother in law with a Jeep Wrangler!

I'm holding my adorable nephew Davis while
we watched the 4th of July Fireworks!

We took family pictures for my moms birthday!

Look at the Nations

2006-08-11T14:10:00.000-07:00

“Look among the nations and watch— Be utterly astounded! For I will work a work in your days Which you would not believe, though it were told you." Habakkuk 1:4-6

Everything going on the last few months has really stirred me to be more prayerful of the nations. Today I was reading the news at work and there are 4 million in India who have been left homeless after flooding(this is on top of the millions there already homeless). There are several other countries experiencing flooding with death and disease a companion. My heart is just hurting for the world and all that is going on. Let's not forget to pray for the nations and our fellow brothers who are ministering the gospel there.

Be Still

2006-07-25T20:10:00.000-07:00

Still is not a word that has crossed my mind nor an action that my body has engaged in over the last several months. Tonight I finally crashed, I am still. My mind is slowly quieting down and my body has no choice but to be still, as I am exhausted. Over the year my life has changed dramatically, and I have had little time to process it all, beginning with getting engaged last September, graduating, beginning post-graduate life, planning a wedding, getting married, making major life decisions 3 weeks after being married, finding jobs, starting jobs, moving to a "new" town, starting another new job, moving into another new house. I'm exhausted. I don't care that my house is packed in boxes and my car, I don't care that my closet isn't organized neatly, I just want to rest and savor the fact that my house is quiet, and I have nothing to do tonight that can't wait until tomorrow.

The last year seems like a blur, and here I sit, married, in a new house, living next door to my relatives who lived in Seattle for the past 5 years, graduated from college, my best friends gone all over the US, and it seems so surreal. But tonight I am enjoying being still and soaking in all the changes that have taken place in the past year of my life. Its hard to believe things I dreamed of for so many years have finally taken place, and yet I know there are more to come.

Freedom

2006-07-04T12:51:00.000-07:00

I'm sure that this is going to be a common blog theme for today, seeing as how it is July 4, Independence Day. However, I don't think that our freedom in Christ can ever be overstated. Today I have been in awe of the fact that all the freedoms I enjoy are ones that I have not fought for or done anything to recieve. My freedom in Christ was paid for by the blood of Jesus, and my American freedoms were fought for by brave men. So often I fail to remember the price that has been paid for the daily freedoms that I enjoy, so here's my remembering the blood that has been shed for us to enjoy freedom on so many levels. Thank you sweet Jesus.

"What are you doing in the world?"-Dax Isbell

2006-07-04T12:41:00.000-07:00

My two and half year old nephew, Dax Isbell, who is learning how to talk got his words mixed up one day and instead of saying, "What in the world are you doing?", he said "What are you doing in the world?". Well when my sister-in-law told me this story immediately the phrase went straight to my heart and I have pondered it since she told me.

Bryan and I are in a place of waiting. We don't know what the futureholds, we only have glimpses and the next immediate step. However, the question resonates in my heart because as I go through out my day it keeps my focus on glorifying the Lord. I know that He has a plan and a purpose in this time of preperation for the things to come, but I don't want to be so caught up in the things to come that I miss those divine appointments to minister His love and grace to those around me. We are looking forward to our move "home" in August to be closer to family and to begin this season of preperation as the Lord continues to mold in us the plans He has for us.

I thought I would share the profound thought of my nephew with you because its a good question to ask ourselves..."what are we doing in the world?" to minister grace and love to the lost? Are we spending our days glorifying our creator or magnifying ourselves?

Blessed

2006-06-27T18:42:00.000-07:00

The last few weeks have been full and not without there moments, however, through every day I have seen how tremendously blessed I am. There is no way the negative can out weigh the blessings in my life!

TOP 12
1. David and Farah, Dax and Cole are home
2. I got to spend the weekend in NC in the beautiful Blueridge Mountains
3. I made a new friend who lives in CA
4. I got to worship with 200 amazing godly women, be encouraged, inspired, humbled
5. I got some rest and rich fellowship with Jesus
6. I got to see my newest nephew several times in one week
7. I got to drive 10 hours with my mom and have good conversation
8. I have an amazing husband
9. I got to drive a Jeep Wrangler
10. My mom and I made it home from NC safely, and on Sunday
11. The Lord provided faithfully everything we needed this week
12. Mine and Bryan's car repairs were cheaper than we thought

Bottom 4
1. My car died on the way home from NC Sunday afternoon
2. The mechanics at Sears and Firestone argued for 2 hours about the problem
3. I cried while standing in the rain because they wouldn't listen to me about the problem
4. Bryan's car had to go to the shop the day after mine had to have a new battery and alternator

2006-06-17T14:51:00.000-07:00

war eagle
These are a little late, but we can't upload pictures off our computer at home. But this is my handsome nephew who grows cuter everyday!

Life!

2006-06-11T19:02:00.000-07:00

Wow! I can't believe its been over a month since I posted. Life is full and wonderful right! Bryan and I are growing a lot spiritually, personally, and together. We are excited about whats to come. This weekend has been a full one, refreshing and encouraging.

Thursday I left for the drive to Birmingham to see my best friend Julia compete for the title of Miss Alabama. The drive was a nice break to think and pray. The evening was great, minus some sour talent, Julia was incredible in her evening wear dress! Friday I got to spend the day with my second mom and my surrogate grandmother. We shoe shopped and had lunch! It was a great day, relaxing, and refreshing. A true blessing from the Lord. Friday night I got to catch up with Mer and Jared over dinner, it was great fellowship. Julia stole the show with her amazing piano performance. Saturday was a great day hanging out with my family and playing with my adorable nephew and the back to Birmingham for Miss Alabama finals. Julia did amazing and placed 2nd runner up for the second year in a row. She was so excited!

We are now looking forward with much anticipation to the arrival of David and Farah, Dax and Cole and the rest of the fam that is traveling across the country and will arrive on Sunday! It will be exciting and wonderful to have the entire Isbell clan in the same state and within 45 minutes of each other

ITS A BOY!!

2006-05-10T16:26:00.000-07:00

Well the suspense is over...my sister and her husband had a boy! Early monday morning at 1:22 am, Davis Andrew Brewer was welcomed into this world. It was such an amazing experience to be a part of! The Lord blessed my sister with a fairly mild labor and with a beautiful and healthy baby! I became an aunt of 4 nephews and 1 niece, when Bryan and I got married, but I am so excited to be an "official" aunt of my own sisters little boy!!

you can view pictures at:
www.lorimercer.com/brewer

I love my job

2006-05-04T16:34:00.000-07:00

Don't ask me why because most people would hate it, but I love it! Today I spent my entire 5 hours at work typing data into a computer. I spent the last week hauling 1400 patient files up and down a ladder from the attic, putting the numbers into a database. I know the reason I love this job and not because of the actual work...although I don't mind it and it doesn't bore me. I love that I get to spend a lot of time in prayer, I love that I get to pray over each patient by name...even though I don't know who they are or anything about them except they have arthritis. But how cool is it that I prayed for 1400 people that I don't know by name. I love that I get to be a light in a dark place! Today it was very clear to me why I love working in this type of environment. This is the second doctors office job I have had and in every case it was the same....the staff gripes and complains about the doctor and each other. My first day at work I overheard one of the head nurses saying she wished we were more like a family...the Lord pricked my heart and I have since been praying certain things over the office. The ladies I work with all come from difficult situations and don't appear to be walking with the Lord, however, they are hurting and just want someone to genuinely care about them.

I told Bryan that the reason I think I have wanted/like to work in this type of environment is because I have the ability to make the place one of encouragement rather than discouragement and negativity. The doctor needs a supportive staff not one that gripes behind her back....and they all need one another to help them not only through the day but through life. I realize as a believer the power I posses through prayer to change the atmosphere of the office. I look forward to seeing what the Lord does in my time there as He continues to show me how to pray for them and how to be an encouragement to them!

Oh and by the way...I am no longer just a full-time file-clerk I am the medical records person...I like that it sounds more professional than file-clerk!!

Scrubs

2006-04-30T12:49:00.000-07:00

So you go into a doctor's office and think to yourself "Man I would love to wear scrubs everyday".
Well, having had this thought many times before...I was excited when I got a job at a daycare and the "uniform" was scrubs. After having worked there for 3 weeks, I hate wearing scrubs everyday. So just in case you thought it would be great to wear scrubs everyday, let me set the record straight...its not as glorious as it looks. I got a new job at a doctor's office and they give me the option of wearing them if I want too since I own 3 sets now. It will be nice on those lazy days when I don't want to spend time picking something out...but for the most part I'm enjoying getting to look "cute" everyday! So just in case you were wondering...scrubs aren't what they appear to be!

Nepal

2006-04-26T09:55:00.000-07:00

I miss Nepal...bad. I'm craving Nepali food, to speak Nepali, to wear Nepali clothes, to see the mountains, to get lost because the taxi driver doesn't understand english, to hold my nose so I can't smell the foul smells. I miss it. But more than missing Nepal and its culture...my heart hurts. There are so many lost people there, Nepal remains 1 % christian. I have a friend going this summer and I'm so jealous, I'm ready to pack into her suitcase. There has been such an urgency in my spirit lately about reaching the lost and praying for the lost and unreached. The other night I couldn't stop crying as I tried to fall asleep thinking about the sweet Nepali people who don't know Jesus and serve false gods so devoutly out of fear of them. I'm praying the Lord will open the doors for me and now my husband to return soon. Thanks for listening to me over the last six years tell my stories of Nepal.

The Million Dollar Question

2006-04-25T07:41:00.000-07:00

Since making the decision about a month ago not to go on staff with GCM, Bryan and I found ourseleves bombarded by the million dollar question of "what are you going to do now". Deffinately not a bad question, we just didn't have an answer and we might could have gotten at least 100 dollars if we got a dollar for every person who asked us the question =)!! So anyway, if you have been talking to us over the last month, you would know that just about everyday changes the "plan". We walked away from our decision not to go on staff with general direction from the Lord, and peace that specific direction would come, and amazing peace that we were where we were supposed to be! We really felt the Lord wanting us to move away from the Montgomery/Auburn area since this is all we've ever known and have a "fresh" start. So we began looking with what little direction we had. In the past month, Nashville, Colorado, Seattle, and Kentucky have all be considered...we got excited about all of them but yet no peace. A simple phone call changed a lot and we think the lucky state is North Carolina. Since so much of the planning is still in the praying and planning stages, I will leave it at we have peace about moving to North Carolina and the Lord is showing us what He has for us there and we are extremely excited! He is deffinately leading us to places and areas of ministry we never saw ourselves being used! More details will come as I feel that the Lord gives me freedom to share with you! We will remain in Auburn at least until August! So come party at the Payne St. house this summer!!

To Know Him and Make Him Known

2006-04-17T08:48:00.000-07:00

Over the last two weeks I have been asking the Lord to give me a mission/vision statement to be kind of my banner or mindset for each day. The other night He spoke this one to me..."to know Him and make Him known". It has been so exciting to see how each day takes on a different form when this is my mindset. I was telling a friend the other day, that I love that it encompasses all of life and not just one facet of ministry. That I can know Him in every second of life and that I have the opportunity to make Him known in every aspect of life. It also helps me from finding my identity in "ministry" which I sometimes do, but instead I long to make Jesus known in any way form or fashion. Over the last two weeks the Lord has begun to stretch me as He is slowly revealing bits of His plan for us. There are ways that He is leading me that I never thought He would use me, but yet I am so excited about the adventure ahead of us.

The other day I was at Target on a hunt for some brown flip flops. I had a pair of brown flip flops for about three years, and last fall when we gave our shoes for hurricane relief, I had those on, needless to say it was a bittersweet experience as they were my most favorite pair of shoes. However, the Lord spoke gently to my heart that the shoes that would replace those would be ones with a neat story. Well, now that its summer time, my need for my brown flip flops has come. Granted I was being very picky, but I wanted brown flips flops exactly like my old ones. Well, I was at target just glancing, hoping they might have something that was similar and what would you know, they did! I was trying them on, and untangling them from other shoes when the lady next to me asked if I liked her shoes and if they fit. We proceeded to talk while looking at shoes and this woman began to pour her heart to me about loosing her husband a year ago and how these last few weeks had been so hard. I walked away from that moment so full of joy that in the middle of target, while looking for shoes I was able to minister the grace, love, and compassion of Jesus to that woman. She was clearly hurting if she poured her heart out to a complete stranger in target. This is the kind of life I want to lead, that on a daily basis, in the midst of daily life, I can make Jesus known to complete strangers in Target! I was also so blessed that in giving my favorite shoes, someones feet were covered, and in finding a new pair of favorite shoes, someones life was ministered too!

Not my will be done, but Your will be done

2006-04-04T13:42:00.000-07:00

I have found such freedom and peace in praying such a simple prayer. It is so freeing to place your hands before the Lord and let go of your dreams and desires and whole heartly submit yourself to Him and His plans no matter what they are! As I have walked through this process recently I realized how strong-willed I am. However, at the end of this process after fulling surrendering myself and my dreams to the Lord I couldn't be more at peace and more excited about what He has in store for me and my husband!!! I have more peace now not knowing what the road ahead will hold, but knowing that I am where He wants me, rather than knowing what the road ahead holds and not being where He wants me!

Wedding Pictures

2006-03-24T15:44:00.000-08:00

Here's the link to our wedding pictures for those of you who would like to see!

www.johnanderson.com/corwin

Mr. and Mrs. Isbell

2006-03-21T07:04:00.000-08:00

So its kinda wierd that I have a different last name now and that a boy lives with me...but i'm getting used to it and deffinately not complaining! I love not having to say goodnight and then good-bye. I'm glad when we say goodnight he stays with me. The honeymoon was great! The smokey mountains are so beautiful! We went hiking and took lots of pictures of rivers and the mountains. For his birthday we went to see the Biltmore Estate...that thing is unreal! It was amazing! Our cabin was awesome! The view was incredible, and it was nice to have a whole week to spend together just the two of us! The wedding was perfect, thanks to all of you who came and blessed us by being there. And those of you who helped clean up all the chairs! We couldn't have asked for a better day! Now the fun is over and I have thank-you notes to write, but I shouldn't be complaining because that means that we got gifts!!! I'm enjoying this being married thing!

4 Days!

2006-03-06T11:52:00.000-08:00

Hey guys! Here are the directions for this weekend! If you are coming from Auburn its and hour and a half drive. From Montgomery about 30/45 minutes. I can't wait to see ya'll!

DIRECTIONS:From Auburn take I-85 to Montgomery
Follow I-85 all the way through Montgomery
I-85 will split into I-65Take I-65 south to MobileFollow I-65 South to exit #167(Hgwy80/Selma/Mont.airport)
Follow Hgwy 80 pass the airport-once you pass the airport its 12.9 miles
You will turn RIGHT at the SECOND flashing light(DO NOT TURN AT THE GE PLANT!!)
Turn RIGHT onto Broad Street and follow it until you see the sign for MARENGO PLANTATIONIt's set off the road so you will need to look for the sign
Call if you get lost, however, cell phones don't always work! 334-224-6213

Here comes the bride...

2006-03-01T08:26:00.000-08:00

Hey guys! If ya'll want a sneak peak at my wedding dress you can look at my bridal portraits online! Tell me your favorite and if someone picks the one that I choose for my portrait I'll give you a prize!!!!

www.johnanderson.com/kc

Fulmaya...my other half

2006-02-28T08:03:00.000-08:00

The Lord has truly blessed me with wonderful friendships. However, I have decided that in order for someone to be a close friend of mine a prerequisit is that they not live in the same city as me(with the exception of Layne who has lived in the same room with me for 3 years!). Of my closest friends, three of them live far away and three live relatively close. However, my other half lives on the other side of the country. Katie and I met six years ago in Texas while we were preparing to go to Nepal for 4 weeks. One of the first things I remember about Katie was that she asked me point blank "what has the Lord been teaching you" and we had only known each other for several days. Katie and I ended up sitting next to each other on every flight from the US to Nepal. By the time we arrived in Nepal we were inseparable and everyone knew who the crazy duo was. Katie truly brings out a different side of me. We are so much alike and yet different. We complement one another very well. As far as friendships go...she really is my other half. Over the last six years our friendship has grown in ways I never thought possible living on opposite sides of the country. We always seemed to be walking through the same situations in life or one of us was going through something the other had just gone through. I can't put our friendship into words and what a blessing it is to hear her voice on the end of the phone.
In one short week I will be picking Katie(Fulmaya is her nepali name) up at the airport! I cannot wait to see her! I haven't seen her in over a year! I'm so excited to have her come and stand next to me as I get married. I'm also excited for her to come simply because a part of my heart is in Nepal and in Seattle and Katie shares in that with me. I feel that she is bringing Seattle to me in some wierd way. Bryan's brother and sister-in-law will arrive next week as well from Seattle and I feel the same way about them. That they are bringing me a piece of my heart that remains there. I know this is really cheesy...but its so true. They are bringing places my heart longs for to me. The anticipation of next week is killing me! I don't even know what to expect but I know it will be more than I could imagine!

"My God shall supply all your need..."

2006-02-23T21:43:00.000-08:00

The last couple of months have been a rich season in my life. Upon graduation in December I was "on my own". I have not been a person who had to worry about money, if I wanted something, I usually bought it. My future hubby has come to notice over the years that my impulsive spending sprees are also a part of my flesh. I myself have also recognized that and wanted to tame the impulse. The Lord graciously did that for me. Over these last few months the Lord has provided exactly what I needed when I needed it. There is such a contentment that comes in having just what you need and nothing more. There have been several desires of my heart that the Lord graciously blessed me with through my generous parents during this time. However, I am thouroughly enjoying this growing time in my life where I am content with what I have, and could even possibly get rid of some of the stuff. (I am little concerned as to where all of Bryan's stuff is going to go when he moves in). Its a wonderful place to be, because then when the Lord blesses you with those desires of your heart, that aren't "needs" they are cherished even more. The Lord has also taught me the importance of being a wise steward of his money and really getting a good price on everything.

I was talking recently to a friend who is like a sister to me. The place the Lord is leading she and her husband really challenged me. They feel that they are holding too tightly to some material things the Lord blessed them with at one time. Those blessings were needed and wonderful at one time, but now they feel the blessings are tying them down. They are downsizing in a hgue way and are going to live a much simpler life. It encouraged me to hold the material blessings that I have from the Lord very loosely and to continue to give them back to Him, for He is the blessed giver of all good gifts. In our society, materialism is one of our main idols. I have been caught up in that trap for a couple of years now. I have found in the last few months that there is so much more peace and life, when you have what you need and nothing more. The rest are blessings from our Heavenly Father.

The Lord blessed Bryan and I greatly and met the desires of our hearts above and beyond with our house! I am so thankful to have such a beautiful and wonderful home to open up and have people over, however, I know that HE must always remain my focus rather than my home and what it looks like. I am enjoying this place that I am in...and I'm getting hitched in 14 days!!!!!!!

Faith

2006-02-14T08:26:00.000-08:00

"Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen." Heb. 11:1

"For we walk by faith, not by sight" 2 Corinthians 5:7

"Now this is the confidence that we have in Him, that if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us. And if we know that He hears us, whatever we ask, we know that we have the petitions that we have asked of Him." 2 John 5:14-15

"Faith is grasping the unrealities of hope and bringing them into the realm of reality"

"Jesus said to him, "If you can believe, all things are possible to him who believe" Mark 9:23

"With men it is impossible, but not with God; for with God all things are possible" Mark 10:27

The Lord has been teaching me in a very real and tangible way about faith and trusting Him. Paul says in 2 Cor. 5:7 we are called to walk by faith and not by sight. I have pondered lately, what does that really mean. Well when you look at Heb. 11:1 we see that faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. In calling us to walk by faith and not by sight the Lord is calling us not to look at the reality of our situation, but the ability that God has to work on our behalf. When we look at the reality of our circumstances they seem impossible, but Jesus says, in Mark 9:23 that all things are possible to him who believe. In Mark 10:27, he says that what is impossible for man, is possible for God, because with God all things are possible. What wonderful promises to rest on, that all things are possible for God to him who believes. Jesus calls us to have faith in Him even when the answer is not in front of our face yet. In 1 John 5:14-15 He says that when we pray ACCORDING to His will, we know that He hears us and that we have what we ask of Him *(when we are praying in accordance with His will, not when we are praying for a million dollars just because we want it, its imperative that we be praying in accordance with His will which is His word)* Walking by faith means seeing that the answer to your prayers are already there, even if you don't see them yet. Because faith is the evidence of things unseen. Abraham believed the Lord's promise that he would have son, even though his wife was barren and was ninety years old-that is walking by faith. Believing the Lord over the reality of your situation, and trusting that what looks impossible with man is always possible with God.

Intimacy

2006-02-07T18:51:00.000-08:00

So, i'm still processing this thought a little, but its stirring in my heart and my mind. Often I struggle with the feeling of not belonging, and that i'm missing out on this "community". I look around me and see that everyone else seems to have this whole intimacy thing down and their experiencing deep friendships...and I wonder what is my problem? So I was thinking about Christ and wondered about His life on the earth, and how everyone wanted to be around Him and hear Him teach. I'm sure that everyone wanted to be His best friend and to know Him intimately. However, He selected the twelve to be His disciples and to share His most intimate life with Him, but even beyond that John was the beloved disciple. John shared the most intimate of moments with Jesus, that the other disciples didn't share in. I realized, its not that Jesus picked favorites, but He desired that intimacy, just as we do since we were created in His image. I thought about to how the Lord chooses to reveal secrets to those of us who seek Him and know Him intimately, the Lord guards His heart and with whom He shares His secrets; so why shouldn't I guard my heart? Why shouldn't I pick favorites and have only my few close friends. I love to know that there are deep secrets and desires in my heart that only a select few and Jesus know. I love to know that there is a life hidden inside me and that its only shared with those who are given the key to enter the garden of my heart. I am so thankful that someone told me to save my heart for my husband, and I did just that. I'm thankful that Bryan is one of the only people who knows some of my deepest dreams and thoughts. And knows me better than I know myself sometimes.

However, I think in some ways my view of intimacy is skewed. I can share life with people, share parts of my heart, laugh, and enjoy their company-and that can be intimacy. I don't have to have a heart to heart with someone everytime I see them-although I love to talk deeply. But just because I don't have a heart to heart with someone doesn't mean I can't be intimate with them in a different way. I think in my quest for finding intimacy and having that sense of belonging, i've missed out on just enjoying people. This is hard for me since I connect with people through talking, but my desire is to increase connecting with people through just enjoying them. I love connecting on a deeper level, but I also just miss the days of hanging out and enjoying someones company through fun. I think I miss out on a lot of fun in life b/c I think to much and can be to serious. Oh to be an obliv(inside joke). Lord Jesus, give me the free heart of a child that wants to play and enjoy you and your children! Thank you for laughter and for fun!

Blessed

2006-02-06T20:37:00.000-08:00

Wow, it is such a joy to have people in my home to experience Christ together. Tonight was our first small group and once everyone left, I was overflowing with joy. It was a delight to clean up after everyone(and I don't like to clean). I am just blessed to be able to open up my home for believers to come and experience life together. Its so sweet to know people met with the Lord in your home! I'm so thankful to the Lord for providing us with a wonderful home to have people over so they can meet with Him and fellowship with other believers! It is truly such a blessing!

38 Days!

2006-01-31T12:39:00.000-08:00

The invitations are out! Bryan and I are going to be married in 38 days! I cannot believe how quickly our engagement has flown by. Even in this time from moving from a dating couple, to an engaged couple, I see how much we've grown and learned. I cannot wait to be married and all that it holds for us. We just finished up some premarital counseling. The counsel we were given was so rich. He didn't focus primarily on the issues people face rather he continued to point us to Christ. It really helped me to see in such a clear light that if Bryan and I continue to reflect the love of Christ to one another and lavish grace, love, and mercy on one another the way that Christ does that on us daily, we will continue to have a wonderful relationship. It doesn't mean we won't have bumps and trials, it just means that if we remain focused on the Lord those trials will not be damaging to our relationship they will strengthen our relationship. Bryan has always shown me the love of Christ in our relationship, quick to forgive and to love me through service. I am thankful to be marrying a man who demonstrates to me on a daily basis the love of Christ, yet not only to me but to everyone he is around. I can't wait to begin the journey of marriage as we share the rest of our lives together! The past four and a half years have been an amazing time together. I can't wait to walk out the plan of God for our lives together!

Bittersweet

2006-01-25T19:44:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was a bittersweet day. I pulled up Farah's blog(my future sister-in-law) with excitement because of the picture I knew would be awaiting me...beautiful Mt. Ranier. The picture was amazing, almost surreal(good job David or Farah). It left me speechless and longing to be there to see the mountain with my own eyes. I found myself missing Seattle(well really Orting, WA) and Nepal yesterday. Two completely different places on opposite sides of the world. Yet, both places are very close to my heart. I miss the people there, the food, the smells, the sounds. I'm glad though to miss those places, because it makes it so much better when I get to go there. I'm so excited about the next time I will get to go to Seattle or Nepal. My heart comes alive in those places in a unique way. For now though, I am content to miss those places and long for the day when I will visit them, because I know this is where the Lord has called me, and I'm content here in beautiful Auburn. Ya'll probably think I'm crazy, but its ok...just thought I would share my day of bittersweetness.

The Dreams I dream for you...

2006-01-21T08:39:00.000-08:00

Ok so I'm going to be cheesy...only those of you in Chi-O can really appreciate the cheesiness of this though. During RUSH, Chi-O sings a song and part of the song goes like this..."the dreams I dream for you are deeper than the ones your clinging too, more precious than the finest things you do, and truer than the treasures you pursue. Let the old dreams die, like stars that fade from view, and take the cup I offer and drink deeply of the dreams I dream for you"

"For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are you ways My ways, says the Lord, For as the heavens are higher than the earth, So are My ways higher than your ways, and My thoughts than your thoughts." Is. 55:8-9

"For I know the thoughts that I think towrd you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope." Jeremiah 29:11

These verses and the words of this song speak deeply to my heart, because I am a "dreamer" I love to think of grand dreams...but yet it amazes me that the Lord has dreams and plans He has for me are far beyond any of the dreams I could ever imagine. I know some of the dreams I have "dreamed" are dreams He has placed in my heart, and I hold those dreams very close to my heart and only a treasured few people know them. However, it excites me to think that the Lord has so much planned for mine life...and I am so excited to begin this next phase of the journey called marriage, because I know that He has amazing plans for our lives! Right now I am recognizing that the Lord still has me in a place of preperation...and preperation time is never lost time. I am also realzing that there are some dreams I must let go of, because they are my dreams and not dreams inspired by the Lord. I know that its not time for me to step into what the Lord has shown me He has planned for me(parts of it anyway). I am excited for this time of preperation, as the Lord continues to mold me, to chisel me, and prepare me for the plans He has for us. I even more excited about the plans He has for Bryan and the things the Lord will accomplish through him. I am so excited to begin this wonderful journey with the man of my dreams!!!

355 Payne St.

2006-01-19T18:35:00.000-08:00

This is the living room with the sofa and loveseat the Lord provided
Our bed without the mattress(its much more comfortable now)
The dining room has a cool paint finish but you can't really see it
We have a screened in porch too!

Here are pictures of our house on Payne St! Come by and see us for those of you who live in Auburn!

This is the kitchen...they remodeled it and its soo cool!

This is the guest room/office that is currently occupied by my best friend and faithful roommate of 3 years. I am really sad that she will soon be replaced...but very gladly welcoming my new roommate(he's a boy...isn't that weird!). And my favorite room is the pinkish room that has the books...its my reading/personal space room! I hope you enjoy!

Believing God for the Desires of your heart

2006-01-15T15:22:00.000-08:00

Psalms 37: 3-7 "Trust in the Lord, and do good; Dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness. Delight yourself also in the Lord, and He shall give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord, trust also in Him, and He shall bring forth your righteousness as light, and your justice as the noonday. Rest in the Lord and wait patiently for Him!"

For over a year now these verses have been very close to my heart. The verses that have really guided my thinking and my steps. One of the biggest things the Lord has taken me through this past year is having believing faith. I am amazed as I sit here in my house on Payne Street at the work of the Lord.

For at least two years I have been in love with Payne street, and more specifically a particular house on Payne Street. I would always cut through Payne Street to drive home so that I could drive past "my" house. Bryan and I always joked that the house would be for sale when we got engaged...well to our dissappointment it wasn't(like we could have afforeded it anyway). That ended our looking for a house to rent/buy on Payne Street. We were so excited to find out that Billie and Travis needed renters for their little home and we could deffinately afford the rent so we went for it. Then we found out we were second on the list for the house. So we started looking again. I was driving home one night, I do believe from TCBY, on the phone with my mom, when the voice of the Lord instructed me to drive down Payne Street. I listen to the Lord when I drive because I don't want to get into an accident. So I kept chatting and drove home down payne street thinking nothing of it until I got almost to the end of the street and saw a for rent sign. I freaked out and called Bryan, we called the owners and set up a time to come by and see it.

It was love at first sight...with the exception of having no pets...the house was more than I ever could have imagined so we set up a time for an interview. The Lord really began to stir in my heart the things He wanted to accomplish in the house and I knew it was where He wanted us. Except that they don't rent to undergrads...and even though I was graduating in December, Bryan was still an undergrad. We decided to trust the Lord because we really knew He was leading us to this house. Even though all odds were against us, the Lord gave us favor and we trusted Him to get us the house despite the circumstances. And He did, and I sit here amazed that I am living in a house on Payne Street that is more than I ever could have hoped for. The Lord amazes me how He meets the desires of our hearts. Once I figure out how to put pictures on this thing I will post some of our lovely home...those of you in AU should stop by though!

To Do Lists

2006-01-15T07:50:00.000-08:00

Its seems lately that my to do lists never end. This past week I worked consistently everyday from 8 am -8 pm and yet at the end of each day I still had tons that was not accomplished. Even by the end of the week everything I had hoped would be done wasn't. I will be the first to admit, I don't ALWAYS use my time wisely, but thats something I have been working on and this past week I was very productive with my time and yet the end of the to do list is no where in sight. Last night I was working on wedding stuff and felt somewhat like a loser for being at home on a saturday night by myself working on wedding stuff. I contemplated calling several people, but i knew I wouldn't enjoy myself because I would know how much there was to be done. It's so frustrating to me because these things are things that must be done, however, they are things that keep from doing what I truly love to do. I have found that its hard for me to enjoy spending time with people just hanging out b/c I always feel guilty because I know there is so much else I could be doing. I long for a day when I can sit down and have NOTHING to do...where I can choose to do whatever I want to do and not feel bad b/c something else is not getting done. And yet while I was having my pitty party last night the Lord gently tugged on my heart and reminded me that I am never alone, and He is always with me, tying ribbons on the programs and that while I get frustrated by having to do all these seemingly pointless things(b/c I know at least the guests will throw their program away!) He is right there with me for me to talk with Him and enjoy His company. So while I feel that my to do list may not have an end for a while, I am going to savor those moments with the Lord and tie every ribbon with joy!

Thought for the day

2006-01-12T11:53:00.000-08:00

"Isn't that so like God to want us to trust Him and His power to do things for that doesn't intend for us to do for ourselves."

In raising support, I am making the phone calls and meeting with people and asking them to support me and yet all the while its still the Lord who provides the money for me. Its something I've been thinking about these last couple of days. That the Lord is my provider and He is the one who will provide the money for me even though I'm making the phone calls! How great is our God that He works on our behalf! Praise the Lord He is my Provider!!

Believing God

2006-01-10T07:39:00.000-08:00

I know its been awhile since I posted, I apologize to all of you who were dissapointed each time you checked my blog to see the same title pop up. A lot has been going through my mind over the last month and I've been trying to decide what I wanted to post.

in Matthew 7:8-10 a picture of great faith is displayed for us. The centurion comes to the Lord and asks Him to heal His servant, the Lord says He will go and heal the servant but the centurion stops him and says, "Lord, I am not worthy that You should come under my roof. But only speak a word, and my servant will be healed." What a profound display of faith! This man believed that the Lord was powerful enough to heal a person simply by speaking the words out of His mouth. In verse 10 Jesus says, "Assuredly, I say to you, I have not found such great faith...go your way; and as you have believed, so let it be done for you."

In Mark 11:23-24, Jesus says, " Have faith in God, for assuredly, I say to you, whoever says to this mountain, 'Be removed and be cast into the sea', and does not doubt in his heart, but believes that those things he says will be done, he will have whatever he says. Therefore I say to you, whatever things you ask when you pray, believe that you have recieved them, and you will have them."

Jesus commands us here to have faith in God, a command is a form of sentence structure indicating action. Jesus is telling us to have faith in God and His word. Just like we feed our bodies so they will grow or we water a plant so it will grow, we have to feed our faith so it will grow. How do we feed our faith? We feed our faith with the word of God and then acting on God's word. If we feed our body food so it will grow but then we don't use our bodies energy we become fat, however if we use our energy and build muscle we become stronger. The same is with our faith, we can feed our faith God's word but if we don't act on His word we become spiritually overweight. If we act on God's word though we build our faith muscles and become stronger.

What could we accomplish for the Lord if we had faith like the centurion, if we had believing faith that knew the Lord would answer our prayers.

Walking by faith and not by sight is a journey that I have traveled these past few months and its such a joy to believe God for things that are not yet seen. "Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen." Hebrews 11:1 The Lord calls us to have faith in things that we cannot see and believe, according to His word that He is faithful.

I hope this year we will all feed our faith the word of God and grow in our ability to believe God!!

All you need is love...(a girl has got to eat)

2005-11-17T16:00:00.000-08:00

The title is a tribute to all those Moulin rouge lovers out there (d) but it also has a meaning

Well, lately i have been giving you guys glimpses of my life but not really my heart. I've kind of been chewing on a lot lately. And it's been taking me awhile to process all of it and spit it out. So I apologize if its not very coherent and jumbled.

For over a month now the Lord has really been speaking to me regarding love. When Bryan and I got engaged we began looking for a verse to really focus our engagement and the wedding on and as I was with the Lord one day He continued to take me to passages of love. And yes we know weddings are all about love...but they truly are. Don't worry the love chapter won't be read at our wedding, but I have been meditating on the "love chapter" and really delving into our Father's love. The Lord has been showing me how central love is to the body and that without love everything else is in vain. Paul says in 1 Corinthians 13:1-4 "Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels but have not love, I have become a sounding brass or a clanging cymbal, and though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, but have not love, it profits me nothing"

So often I think we get caught up in "doing" and seeking the deeper things of the Lord but just as Paul says here through inspirtation of the Holy Spirit, it profits us nothing if we have not love. Love is the central element in furthering the kingdom of God. The word also says "they will know they are mine by their love". Do we as a body love each other the way Christ loves each of us. Do we seek the good of others above our own good, are we quick to forgive the way christ is quick to forgive us. If we want to see the greater works of God we have got to start loving one antoher the way Christ loves us. Do we love our families, are we patient with them, kind and gentle. Paul says in 1 cor. 13:13 "And now abide, faith, hope, and love, but the greatest of these is love."

I challenge us to love one another the way Christ loves each one of us. "...the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy spirit who was given to us." Romans 5:5 As a
believer the Holy Spirit has been given to us and according to this verse if we have the Holy Spirit the Love of God has been poured into our hearts which means that we have the divine ability to love people!

It is clear this is a message the Lord is speaking to our community because I am not the only one that the Lord is teaching this too. If we want to see a mighty movement of God in our generation we need to start by loving one another!!!!

To be continued...

Tradition

2005-11-06T16:54:00.000-08:00

What is so wonderful about being around people who know you and love you and accept you. Every year around the end of October, beginning of November my family goes camping with 4 other families. This has been going on for 30 years! It began with my mom and her 4 best friends from college going camping every year to stay in touch. Now we are on to our 3 rd generation of children. The people I was among are so wonderful. We talked about the Lord worshiped together, laughed together, talked about life together, and just had fun in the beauty of Lake Martin. I can't even begin to explain how absolutely beautiful and wonderful it was. I was so excited about the weekend all last week and my expectations were completely fulfilled. I was encouraged in the Lord and got to have fun and laugh with some of the people I cherish the most in my life. The best part about it was that for the first time Bryan got to come with me. We have always had the rule that no friends or significant others could come unless you were engaged, and so finally Bryan got to come. He was welcomed into the group with love and of course our typical pranks =) I'll let you ask him about his initiation =). One day when I learn how to put pictures on this thing I'll put one up of our beautiful weekend! I am just so thankful for friendships and tradition because this weekend of every year is one of my favorite traditions ever!!

Sugar and Spice and Everything that's Nice

2005-10-22T21:34:00.000-07:00

So today was a blast! My mom and I headed up to Birmingham to spend the day wedding dress shopping. My best friend Julia and her mom joined us once we were there, as well as my surrogate grandmother Dink. What a blessed day to be surrounded by some of the people I care about and cherish the most as we searched for the "perfect" gown! Just for fun my mom and I had made two appointments at some very nice bridal shops...a warning to all...once you go there is no turning back! There is a reason designers are good at what they do...i did not put one ugly dress on today! They were all beautiful...and so were the prices =). However, it is very hard to look at other gowns in the same light when you have put such wonderful gowns on your body! I'm glad there are some people out there who have that kind of money to spend because I sure don't! I can't even imagine spending thousands of dollars on a dress that I will wear for ONE DAY(maybe two for my portrait). I think just to justify spending that much money I would put it on and wear it once a month after the wedding! However, trying on so many beautiful dresses made the choice that much harder...I have to say I haven't a clue...well a small one but I can't tell ya'll because it would ruin the surprise. I just don't know how a girl makes such a huge decision...Bryan can attest that I am the most indecisive person...so how on earth can I pick just ONE dress!!! Thankfully I have the Lord...because Bryan also knows well that if I don't love my outfit I will be in a terrible mood and obviously we can't have that on the wedding day!!! So now I just have to find the one that I love and feel the most beautiful in! Going to the fancy boutiques was so much fun...I felt very rich...like I really did have the money to spend on one of their dresses(if they only knew how SMALL my budget was!!) It was such a wonderful day! I am so blessed! I can't wait to see which one I end up with!

Overflow

2005-10-21T07:19:00.000-07:00

This week the Lord has totally blown me away with blessings. It's been such a good reminder though of His love for me as my Abba, and just as my parents desire to give me the things that I want so does the Lord. It's also been wonderful to be able to give all the glory to Him for each thing. The Lord continuallly blows me away by the fact that He knows my desires far better than even I know them! There's no way I can take credit for all the things He's blessed me with.

1. A wonderful finace' who speaks truth over me, is supportive and helps me make the best decision, and enjoys doing all the wedding stuff with me

2. A beautiful wedding dress that I feel radiant in, has certain things that I wanted, and also has certain things that I never imagined I would want...but fit me perfectly
("Karen, that dress looks like you just hanging on the hanger"-my best friend Layne)

3. An amazing mother who answers my 12 million phone calls a day(she's the only person I can talk to b/c our minutes are free and I went over my minutes for the month already)...who calls the caterer, photographer, etc. for me...who picks up at the last minute to drive to Auburn when I think I found my wedding dress and take me to dinner.

4. A kitchen table exactly as we wanted it...on sale

5. Pillows that i wanted and couldn't find anywhere!!

6. A couch for free!!!

7. A caterer with amazing prices who gives 50% of his profit to missions!! So half the money we spend on the delicious food you will all eat at the reception will got to missions! What better way to spend your money??!!!

8. A wonderful dinner last night that made me remember my summers in Nepal and the people there.

9. An incredibly sweet time with Jesus and the girls on the prayer team last night before Encounter

10. Our friends and family who are loving on us and supporting us during this time! I can't even begin to tell you how much each one of you has blessed our hearts with excitement and congratualtions...the Lord has used ya'll to bless us and remind us how much we are loved and how much people care about us!

I can't even begin to tell ya'll how faithful the Lord has been to us during this time! I am not stressed out... the Lord has made everything fall into place far beyond what I could have hoped or imagined! My mom has been amazing helping get things done! Thank ya'll so much for being there for us and making this time so wonderful and sweet! I wish we were going to be engaged longer...wait what am I saying...no I don't...5 months is plently long enough!!!

The Secret is OUT!!!

2005-10-06T10:45:00.000-07:00

Finally! The secret is out! Bryan and I are engaged! He proposed last friday night. I had gone to Montgomery for the day and he came over to see his family that afternoon. The original plan was for us to ride back to Auburn together and he had planned to propose in Auburn...but I decided I was going to stay in Montgomery and ride to Auburn Saturday with my parents. Bryan knew that if he tried to convince me to come back to Auburn I would know something was up...so he came up with a plan B. We went to the Shakespeare Festival to have a picnic dinner at sunset. It was normal for us to do something together on Friday night because we don't spend a lot of time together during the week. So we were eating our dinner and he said he needed his phone because someone from work was supposed to call him. He came back though with his guitar. At first I thought oh we're going to sing some worship songs...but then he said he had a surprise for me and he wanted to play me a song. So he played a song that he had written for me two years ago(I had never heard it). The last line of the song is "Lord you know how honored I would be if she would marry me"...I was already crying because the song is amazing but at that point I kind of starting freaking out because I knew what was coming. He put the guitar back in the case and said he had another surprise for me and then pulled out the ring box. I freaked out and closed my eyes and buried my face in my hands. I didn't even know that he got down on one or knee or what he said to me. As soon as he was done talking I just jumped in his arms and gave him a big hug. He said I told him yes over a minute later. Then he asked if he could put the ring on my finger and of course I said yes...but I closed my eyes again...and when I opened them I freaked out again...because its beatiful. He could not have picked a better ring. I love it so much!! We are getting married March 11, 2006 at Marengo Plantation; its an old plantation home outside Montgomery. It's so beautiful! We are so excited!!!

A day in the life

2005-09-28T18:51:00.000-07:00

So today my job as the lil' intern consisted of putting labels on postcards that we are going to pass out at Encounter about Passion 06...the funny thing is now that I think about it...I put a label on over a thousand postcards and I couldn't tell you anything the postcard said, except the date and city. So....don't ask me any questions about Passion 06 because I probably don't know the answer. However, while labeling I was able to spend some quality time in front of the television because putting labels on postcards by yourself in a quite office gets REALLY boring REALLY fast!!! I first learned how to look 10 years younger if I have a lot of money to get some really expensive surgery and facial things(I want the cheap homemaid treatments, not the ones that break the bank)...then I got a good dose of Stever Erkle which was good laugh, then I watched Erik and Cory grow up and learn hard life lessons on boy meets world...then Michelle Tanner learned to tie her shoes and DJ and Steve said I love you and got caught making out. Lastly I realized why I never want 7 kids from seventh heaven. I'm sure by this point you are thinking I did nothing productive today...however I labeled consistently from 11am-6pm, with only 2 breaks. And a good dose of tv can get you thinking, which it did...but I'm still processing all those random thoughts.

Tonight however, was great fun and a huge blessing. Around 18 freshman chi-0 pledges came over for dinner tonight. It was so fun and great to see their beautiful faces and hang out with them and get to know them. They are some amazing girls. I am still smiling at just what a blessing it was to be able to open up and home to them and cook dinner for them...I love that we have that ability...to open our homes and share the love of Christ through hospitality...it makes me excited about having a home of my own one day and it makes me think about my future home and what kind of place I want to be able to open up to others! I love my internship!! It is so wonderful!!!! I love being able to do what I love to do every single day all day!!! The Lord is soooo good.
Sorry it was sooo long!

I have a little head

2005-09-23T20:53:00.000-07:00

So today I got measured for my cap and gown and ordered my graduation invitations. Who would have ever thought you could make a living off college students walking across a stage and getting a diploma but the balfour people sure know how to get every last penny out of the broke college students...some of the options you would have to take a loan out for. It was kind of weird...its all very surreal. The real world still seems very far away...and I think I like it that way. Also can anyone tell me the origin of the word Balfour because quite honestly I think its a really wierd name.

lil' intern

2005-09-16T10:10:00.000-07:00

I know its been awhile since my last post...being a lil' intern keeps my life pretty busy. JP has affectionately nicknamed me lil' intern and its our running joke(although I really am the intern...anyway). Life is good. I am more content right now than I have been in a long time. I am doing something my heart loves and desires and I know I am right where the Lord has me. I do get restless and long to pick up and go for an adventure but the Lord gently reminds me of what an adventure everyday is...and this is true especially working with JP(in a good way!). I have seen what an adventure each day is just living life with the Lord right here in Auburn...everyday looks different...there is hardly any structure to my life...which for the most part drives me crazy! But at the same time I love it! So thats pretty much life for now...structureless and adventerous(doesn't sound too bad huh?)

Fleeting

2005-08-30T14:57:00.000-07:00

It's hard for me to believe that my college years are quickly drawing to a close. I am now 3 weeks into my internship, the final step before graduation and entering the "real world" in December. Looking back over the past 3 and a half years its amazing how quickly they have flown by, freshman year seems more than just two years ago...and the person I was then a distant memory. I am realizing how quickly each day, each hour, each minute, each second of our lives passes us by. It's moments like these that I savor every minute of each day and soak up each day for its fullness, not wanting to miss the beauty and wonder in each day. It's also moments like these that I realize how often I am so consumed with the trivial things in life that a day passes me by without me having enjoyed one minute of the beauty it held. Its alot times like this that I realize how I often I float through the days acknowledging the Lord but yet not being sensitive to His leading and missing those divine appointments. My greatest desire in these past few days and weeks is to know the Lord more intimately and to be so in tune with His spirit every moment of my day, that each day is filled to overflowing with testimonies and divine appointments. As I am realizing how quickly life is flying by I am also realizing how imperitive it is to make sure that I am on target with the will and plan of the Lord for my life. Our life is so sweet and yet so fleeting, not a moment can be wasted, we were left here on this earth as the church, the hands and feet of Christ to His works. My prayer is that I would never miss a divine appointment from the Lord(although because I am human I will) and that each day would be lived in the perfect will of my Heavenly Father.